Just got this e-mail from Paul Binkley who you might remember from my newsletter a few weeks back. Paul used the NLP submodality “Like To Dislike” technique to curb his appetite for micro brewed beer. He perfectly exhibits one of the main characteristics of a Modern Jedi NLP practitioner and that is “wanton curiosity and a willingness to experiment, explore and put new ideas into action.” BTW I’ll be interviewing Paul on Monday May 12 at 4:30 pm Eastern Time. To register for the call follow this link: www.ModernJedi.com/FreeClass.htm
This focus thing has been on my mind this week. A friend was feeling really down over the loss of his mother to diabetes last year. The memory that had been haunting him was that of being with her right before she died and accidentally resting his hand on her bare leg. Due to the diabetes her leg was cold and hard as if she were dead already. The experience creeped him
out and had been the defining memory for him.
He was telling me about how negative the loss of his mother has been for him when he mentioned he was the only one with her the moment she passed.
I interrupted him just then and asked him to tell me the story of that event in detail.
He proceeded to tell me about being in the hospital with her and touching her cold hard leg again, then he started recounting the words he had said in her ear as she slipped in and out of consciousness. He told her that he and the others knew she was not afraid to die and was eager to go to a better place and that they were ok with that too. She had their permission to go
now if she wanted.
Then he remembered that his mother looked at him in that moment and, even though she could not speak, she got a tear in one eye and he knew that meant she understood and was happy in her last moment.
This is where I redirected his focus.
I marveled at how wonderful it was to be there in his mother’s final moment and even more so to have her last minute on earth be so fully connected in a loving exchange with her cherished son. I told him that everyone hopes to have such a last moment with their parting parents and loved ones.
He confessed that until I asked him about it he had all but forgot entirely about this part of what happened. Only the memory of the sadness of burying her and touching her cold hard leg had stuck with him.
He thought about what I had said and pronounced that having recovered his memory of her final moment and looking at it as I suggested, he now felt entirely different about the whole thing.
For the last few days, every time I see him, he thanks me for causing him to focus on the awesome experience of being with his mom in her last seconds, and that now it is the memory he clings to and goes back to when ever he is reminded of her, instead of the other memory that had plagued and depressed him for so long.
Thanks Mark for the NLP mini course “random reminder” to carefully choose where we focus.
Thanks for sharing this story Paul!
p.s. Please leave your questions and comments in the space below.